When I was a teenager I went through a period of using steroids.

I was tall and skinny at the time and was never really content with my unathletic frame and awkward physique.  Being impetuous as most teenagers are, I was in a serious hurry to do everything I could to become a player.  In my case bulking up and get some muscles to make myself look and feel better was the motivation.  Being labelled as a hard gainer with an ectomorphic type physique ( long and skinny) gaining body mass was not really part of my genetic make up at the time.

So why was I bothered about getting bigger anyway, well I suppose I lacked confidence in myself, and also I was bullied for a while and was called names like lanky and lofty.  This no doubt gave me a complex which I even still drag around with me today, aged 30.

Like many others in my situation I went though every method I could to find information on bodybuilding and gaining weight.  Mostly from books, websites and magazines. I spent a year from aged 15 to 16 years trying every muscle building routing. I got stronger and maybe about half a stone heavier. On a 6ft 5? long body, the difference wasn’t really very noticeable and I wasn’t getting the returns for my hard work I desired and maybe deserved.

Eventually I struck lucky, at least I thought, discovering a guy who wrote literature about gaining weight with steroids in magazines and underground steroid publications. With excitement I realised the potential for me to get more muscled with this new information and began to fantasise on getting a bodybuilders physique and risk using steroids.  I imagined getting all the girls and being the guy everyone instantly respected.  Of course, it never works out like this but it felt good at the time.

Reading between the lines of his articles I though I would ask the self proclaimed expert if he new a reliable steroid supplier.  After a short chat with him a who’s who of steroids was made available to me and an order from was quickly posted.  To my suprise he not only gave advice, he supplied the gear as well, illegaly I might add.

So I got what I wanted, ordered the strongest testosterone oral variety I could get, which was called napoleon 50. This was described in the manual as being able to put muscles on a tomato which sounded like just the job. I also ordered another important drug which stops your female hormones rising to match the increased amount of testosterone in my system.  Side effects of increased oestrogen could be anything from testicular shrinkage to bitch tits (not a good thing).  So I sent off my postal orders, a week later my parcel arrived.

Within minutes I was taking my first pill then straight down the gym to pump iron for a couple of hours. Taking three pills a day religiously, for the first 14 days not a lot happened, I began to get frustrated and suspected I might have received fake “gear”.  The third week began to produce some big changes, I could lift heavier weights and added about 7 pounds (muscle and water retention) in weight.  The cycle of drugs I was using lasted for six weeks, by the end I was about 10 pounds heavier, and for me very strong.

I was over the moon, happy and felt good. I thought I looked a lot better and has some great future plans.  I had to stop and take a break for a month however as advised. This is routine and gives your system a rest between drug cycles.

A week passed into the steroid free period, my strength began to drop off until it was back to where I started taking steroids and so did my weight. This was disappointing to say the least. I was advised it could have been because I wasn’t eating enough or didn’t cycle the drug properly. I think it was probably because I took the strongest available steroids first time, and once they were out of my system my body restored itself back to the way it was.

I spent another year trying different types of steroids on and off, but never really got very far.  Eventually I was sent poor quality fake steroids by my venerable dealer and no longer continued buying them. 

The bodybuilding lifestyle is hardcore and unrewarding unless you have favourable genetics.  I was a long limbed teenager with a fast metabolism.  I may have needed to eat 10.000 calories a day to gain weight.  Drinking upwards of 6 pints of milk and 5 cans of tuna a day isn’t much fun never mind the drug ingestion.

I have to consider the future health implications for myself now as well as joint problems for lifting heavy weights for my age and frame. I might be fine though, time will tell.  I suppose the morale of the story is learning to accept yourselves as you are.  Bodybuilding is sometimes evidence of a lack of self confidence, making the body bigger to support inner feelings of fear and weakness.  An individual should have a hard long look at themselves before going down the path I did. 

Steroids have been reported to affect the human body adversely. Generally people get used to them while following their fitness models. But when it is the matter of one’s health be it a choice of wearing contact lenses (acuvue advance), going for an exercise plan in a hope to get into the desired shape using an elliptical machine or attempting a fast weight loss by a weight loss pill, professional consultation is a must to ensure personal safety. Otherwise self treating even very minor conditions such as dry eye might result into some serious consequence.

Good luck.